My Story:
He peered up at me
with those irresistible eyes that were so dark, they were nearly black. “Mom, I moved my clip today.”
“What? Are you
serious? This has got to stop! What this time?”
“I ah- I hit someone.”
He looked down at the ground, reluctantly forcing the truth out.
“That’s it, Joey. I
will NOT stand for you bullying. No TV for a week!” I shook my
head. What am I doing wrong? How do I teach compassion?
“But Mom-"
“But nothing. Go to
your room.”
His Story:
“Hey Joey! Wait up! I got something for ya!”
“Uuurrrch!” I slammed on my brakes, and spun my feet into
reverse. “Squeak!” I stopped in front of him.
“Here.” Jack held out
a piece of hard candy. It was gooey and
red. It looked clean. I
popped it in my mouth.
“Thanks!” Jack is my friend. He is the only one on the playground that can
run as fast as me.
“Ooh!” Something wiggled in the dirt. I had to get a better look. A firefly! Cool! I stuck my finger in front
of it and it climbed on for a ride. I
made a tunnel over it with my hands and looked inside the hole I made between my thumb and pointer. It flashed green!
“Jack, check it out!
It’s shooting lightening from its butt!”
I laughed and let him look through the peep hole.
“So what? It’s just a
bug.” Suddenly Jack smacked my hands
apart and the firefly dropped to the ground.
It didn't fly. Is it hurt? Then he stepped on it and shot
its green guts everywhere!
For a second, I couldn't breathe. I wanted to scream! Or cry?
I decided to scream.
“Stupid! You
killed it!” My voice sounded funny. I was so mad! I swung my arm around and smacked
him in the shoulder. I hate Jack!
“Joseph!” The teacher
called. “Get inside this minute, young
man!”
Oh! I feel sorry for him! It's amazing to me how much more there is to the story at times, and just how much kids pick up from us even when we don't think they're listening. Great job!
ReplyDeleteThank you- and yes- that is so true! Oh it scares me how much they probably are picking up all of the time!
DeletePerspective indeed! It always tough to listen to both sides of a story! I really enjoyed this part in particular: "For a second, I couldn't breathe. I wanted to scream! Or cry? I decided to scream." - how you tracked through the thoughts of a frustrated young boy. Well done!
ReplyDeleteThank you! Yes- I can relate to the mixed feeling. Sometimes I think kids are able to express themselves much better than adults. We have to be too darn polite! ha ha
DeleteClimbing into a child's head is a magical thing. I like that you wrote it while using the black and white emotions they feel.
ReplyDeleteIt really is a good reminder to try to be gentle with our children and do our best to figure out the story behind the story.
Thank you- yes that was a challenge- trying to really think about how my son speaks and tying it with how he must think. Still- I don't know if I'll ever quite understand it completely! :)
DeleteOh I'd'a slugged Jack too! Stupid!
ReplyDeleteI love LOVE the whole playground bit. The "shooting lightning from its butt" is OMG good! Well done!
Ha ha! Yes- I sure wanted to smack the guy myself! (I was secretly proud when I heard the whole story!)
DeleteI love how you wrote both sides, really highlighting the difference in perspective of the people, not just taking on a single different perspective for you as a writer. Well done!
ReplyDeleteThank you! Yes, I was trying to make it kind of come full circle- if that makes sense!
DeleteI was a little lost with his comment about. Icing his clip but I assume that is a classroom thing for when you get in trouble ?
ReplyDeleteOverall and enjoyable piece. I love getting both sides. Goes to show sometimes as a parents you don't know the whole story
Oh it's actually moving his clip. Yes- totally a classroom thing. I guess that is kind of vague. Thank you!!
DeleteI was totally confused by the "move the clip" thing -- after I read the whole thing and realized he was at school and that maybe it was a school thing (our school did similar stuff...), I reread, and the story made so much more sense. Finding a way to clarify that at the beginning would probably help what is otherwise a really great scene. I like how you included both perspectives.
ReplyDeleteThis proves why it's important to get both sides of the story! And by the way, saw your spotlight interview on Write On Edge! Very cool!
ReplyDelete